Sunday, March 18, 2012

Bathroom Poetry

Thought I'd post again.  I was once studying the sink in my bathroom and wrote this.  The artistic philosophy I took when writing this was trying to capture the sound of sink.  I'm a bad poet.  I hope you enjoy it anyway.

a faucet leak
in thinking sink
drip after drip
drip drip


Tuesday, June 7, 2011

A tribute to my brother Jacob

I rediscovered this band/song which reminded me of my brother Jacob on a mission is San Jose, California.  So, I thought, since I don't write him, I'll pay tribute to him in my blog via this song.  This is the kind of music he listens to.  It's called hard-dance.  It's a form of dub-step with an emphasis on club/house techno.  I'm sure my brother would love to hear this.  As for me, I'm undecided.  It's good when you're in the right mood.  Decide for yourself.  Well, here it is, Moogerfoogin by Organ Donors.
Organ Donors - moogerfoogin (dRUCK Records) by Organ Donors

Monday, May 16, 2011

The Last Few Days.

This has been how I feel.  I'm sure a lot of you do the same.


Sunday, April 10, 2011

My childhood...

I decided to write a not large blog post today.  I'm keeping it short for once.  To sum up my childhood, I have provided an ad about my favorite TV show as a kid.  I would watch it in German though.  This video may have little to do with the actual plot of the show....never mind.  It does in fact sum up all that the series is about, and explain why I am so...strange.  I love this video. Enjoy.


Thursday, March 10, 2011

Rawr! Dinosaurs...Dangerous or Delightful?

Rawr!  So, might I say that I love dinosaurs.  I mean, who can't love this:

Aww...Aren't they just adorable?  Just look at them.  So the thing about dinosaurs is that while they may be cute, they do in fact have another side.  A side that I have until recently been oblivious of.  A less cute side.  This side:

Aww...Aahhh!  Yes my dear friends.  Not all dinosaurs are cute and cuddly.  Imagine getting out of the shower, getting dressed, then looking our your window to find that.  Not the best way to start a day, since being eaten alive isn't one of my favorite activities.  I honestly find that to be quite and awkward experience.  Which has led me to think about how safe the parameters of certain homes are.

Anyway, that's not the point I'm trying to make.  I would like to address the topic of "Dinosaurs, Dangerous or Delightful?"  Now there are many points to be addressed concerning this matter, and I know I can only address a few, but I hope to just get you all thinking about this pressing matter.


This is the part of dinosaur culture that we have closest to us (since Jurassic Park is in South America).  Thanksgiving point actually hold the largest collection of on display dinosaurs in the world.  So me address this matter.

A far as dinosaur bones go, this is pretty cute.  I mean, if I gave birth to that, I might consider raising it as my own.  Now some of y'all might say, "Jozi, what the bones are you talking about?"  I just need you all to open your minds and accept that some fossils are cute.  Brace yourself, the next is far less cute.

Yeah.  Yeah.  Spooky right?  If I were not riding this, I would not want to be within a mile of this monstrosity.  If you have seen Night at the Museum, you may argue that it's cute.  But, you're wrong.  Call this cute when it is consuming your appendages.

Dinosaurs in general:

This is the more distant relation that we have to dinosaurs.  The one that we have seen from "The Land Before Time" and the one we have seen from "Jurassic Park."  Here I present dinosaurs as they are.  Decide for yourself.

Dinosaurs are known to be loving brothers and sisters.  From birth dinosaurs are known to stick up for their siblings, and bail each other out when they get incarcerated.  Dinosaur sibling are also know to make each other breakfast in bed.

Dinosaurs have razor sharp teeth.  To eat your flesh.  They also wear oddly colored contact lenses, to better read the deepest and darkest secrets of your soul and call you unto repentance.  Might I vouch that this is in fact...not fun.  Confessing a life of misdeeds before getting devoured by a utahraptor, can be a little distressing.

This garden variety archaeopteryx makes a great companion.  They're cute, and enjoy sitting on your shoulder.  They love children.  You will find your children/sibling constantly occupied with your pet archaeopteryx as it pursues them throughout the home attempting to take a nibble at their tender meat.

Big.  Very big.  Ever wonder why water sometimes begins to ripple for no reason? This my friends is why.  Tons upon tons of pure killing machine.  Let me finish on one last point.


Fictional?  Perhaps.  Fantastic?  Precisely.  Yet, as cousins of dinosaurs, the same problem exists.  Cute?  Or a killing machine?

Charizard is adorable.  There is no way that such a cute thing could do you harm.  Yet.....

When dragons become evil power-hungry wizards, it poses some problems.

I thank you all for listening, and fighting the ignorance that exists concerning the cuteness of dinosaurs.  This ignorance still exists, but it can be destroyed.  Long live the revolution.  Props to XKCD.  I'm out, before some friends of mine start serious reconsidering this whole dinosaur issue.


Friday, January 21, 2011

Sexy People

I just thought I would share some of the most beautiful people I have come across.  Enjoy.

I love you all,

Saturday, December 18, 2010

The Christmas Beard

This may come as abhorrent news to some, but, since Christmas break is soon and none of my friends (one in particular) have to see me over such a long break, I've decided to grow a Christmas beard.  If you didn't know, I have grown a beard before, if you don't believe me go check my Facebook.  I've got pictures there.  It's not a dapper beard, but it can be done, and it's fun to do.  I've decided to make a little Christmas tradition.  And yes, you can have traditions with yourself (like watching Rocky every Thanksgiving all by yourself).  But, I guess I'm not all alone doing this.  I've recruited my dad and Henry Davis to do it with me.  This is an avocation to all those who would like to join me in this august occasion.  God speed.

Speaking of beards, I thought I might make a list of some of the most resolute beards of all times.  They're not in any particular order except the last, which is there for good cause.  I mean, I've been sent this one link to all these batty people growing over-the-top beards, but I'm talk the dopest for realz beards.  Anyway, first on the list.

The Logan:
The Logan was made famous by Hugh Jackman in his role as Wolverine in the X-men movies.  It's cool and all, but I think it's more the hot guy under the chops rather than the chops themselves.  In most cases, the man makes the beard, and for that reason I mustn't be too enthusiastic about my own upcoming beard.

The Old Spice Man Scruff:
Once again, the sexy man that makes the beard.  Yet this beard remains a topic of discussion.  This is the beard that you go for if all you want to prove is that you are capable to grow a beard period.  It's not gross or over-the-top, but it gets its point across being, "The man wearing me, is in fact a man."  It's hot, but once again, I have blonde facial hair making this beard an unachievable beard for me.  But are you up to snuff to grow the Old Spice Man Scruff?  Other like Condalisa Rice have pulled it off though.  I guess being black has something to do with it.
The Neck Bread:
This one is a little out of style, but it still carries some of it's grandeur...No, no, it doesn't. Umm...honestly, this is the most abominable beard of all times.  There is never a reason adequate to ever (ever) grow one of these.  Please, I beg you to stay far away from these beards and the people who happen to where them.  Not to say anything about Henry Thoreau (um...can someone tell me what the bones is on his head/hair?) *shifty looks*.  No not at all, but try and tell me you can trust the next man.
You see, that man is pure evil.  He sits among those on the left hand of God.  Anyway, I could go on about this, but I won't.

The Dragon Stache:

I don't think anyone ought to grow this unless they're Asian.  So that kinda rules me out.  But as you can see Confucius can rock it.  Hmm....maybe John Wilson could pull it off.

The Merlin:
This is the most magical of beards.  All the most powerful wizards port one of these on their grizzled faces.  Just think, Merlin, Gandalf, Dumbldore....all the big names.  But sadly, I don't have the time to grow one of those most magical imperials.  But I have invented a new use for the word "merlin."  You use it like the word cool.  I might be fun.
merlin (adj); [mur-lin]:  characterized by great facility;  highly skilled or clever;  cool;  magical
Just try it, we'll see if it catches on.

The J.C./C. Norris:

 The Jesus (with dinosaur) version:
The Chuck Norris version:
And the George Bush version:
I don't think I'm quite man enough to grow one of those yet.  Maybe after if I watch the "I'll make a man out of you!" scene from Mulan enough, and I go on a mission, maybe I'll try.
And finally...
The Franz Joseph Chops:
Franz Joseph was the king of Austria-Hungry before WW1.  But that isn't truly what made him great (if starting WW1 can be considered great).  Just look at that beard...can't really see it?  Well, here.
There we go.  Now tell me.  What kind of base and evil desire causes a man to put such a nightmare on his face.  It''s...just...why?  Why do that to yourself and the people around you?  It's a selfish action to do such a thing because it causes so much grief and calamity to those around you who have to look at such an atrocity.  Anyway, there y'all have the monster of the beard kingdom.

I feel so bad leaving you all at such a bad note.  Go listen to your favorite song, that should cheer you up.  And I still don't know what to do with my Christmas beard.  Well, we'll just have to see what my facial hair evolves into.  Ha.  I'm sure that I'll get comments remarking, "Don't." or like "You are so dumb Josh."  But oh well.  It's fun.  Have a good day!